I love watching TLC's "Flip that House". I feel that I can somewhat live through the "flipper's" adventure as they go through the process of completely renovating a house. There are so many things that need to be done in and around our 50+ home. Its not a lack of motivation but rather money that has prevented my dream of fixing things up. With that said, I have found small projects that have given me a way to feel that some improvements have been made.
Three weeks ago, I came up with an idea to build shelves for a closet in the laundry room. We had bought a pantry, but it collected lots of stuff instead of food, so the shelves in the other closet would house the "stuff" and leave the pantry for what it was designed for. I always have good ideas when it comes to projects, however, my husband, Todd is the one that usually gets the job. Not because I couldn't necessarily do it, but because after bending his crow bar and other unmentionable tool dismemberments, he prefers to leave me to the ideas, not the work. So, after a trip to Home Depot and an hour of sawing and nailing, three wonderful shelves now sit in our closet.
The project that was even more needed, was the kitchen sink dilemma that we conquered this weekend. Not only did our faucet drip, but the pipes underneath literally poured water at times. I had to fasten a plastic bag so that it would collect the water and after showing my mom my temporary "tape job" on the pipes, I realized the need was immediate. Especially after I squeezed one of the pipes and I felt a "crunch".
We decided we would replace the old faucet and all the pipes except the one leading into the crawl space. That one would require more skill than Todd was capable of at that time. It was a big project, but there is a beautiful faucet and plastic pipes now where most of the leaking used to take place. As for the pipe that couldn't be replaced, it was resealed with plumbers putty and duct tape. Yes, that was my handy work. :)
All this fixing and replacing got me to think how in our own lives we "fix" things. There are relationships that I have or have had that have taken so much effort and pain to keep up that in a way I have treated them like those taped pipes. I have tried to mend holes that have occured over distance or time. Meanwhile, underneath the duct tape and putty there is a rusting pipe that just needs to be taken out. I know people are not expendable, but at the same time, there sometimes is a natural break in relationships that we need to recognize and let go of. I realize that this can seem too simple and maybe viewed as giving up, but I have experienced friendships that just don't seem to work anymore. Either because one side does not make an effort or maybe our lives are just too different now. I try to force things to stay the same, but the reality is that some friendships are only meant for certain moments in our lives and trying to keep something functional when its purpose no longer exists just creates hurt and frustration.
I am so thankful for the friendships I do have that have lasted over the years. Some of those friends live far away, yet the distance doesn't seem to matter. Some of them even live within a short distance, and even though we can not get together like we would like, both sides know our care for each other will not fade. The best friendships can be weighed on those things. I know I may still have moments of struggle when I feel the end of a friendship, but in those moments I hope that the reassurance of those lasting friends will help me to let go.