Wednesday, September 26, 2007

Childhood drama

Its amazing how much the battles my children face bring me back to my childhood. Friendship in itself can be complicated and adding the basics of growing up such as selfishness, jealously and the desire to be accepted makes its all the more stressful.

It all began the first week of school when the two close friends of Hannah's soon declared themselves the "boss of the bus". I heard a small bit from Hannah about how the girls were trying to take charge, but when 2 other moms approached me I realized how big the issue had become. The two friends (who were also sisters) were without mercy teasing other children on the bus. In addition, the oldest of the two would not allow any of the other children to sit in the "6th grade" seats though she was the only sixth grader. Hannah finally talked to the bus driver and when the sisters found out someone had "told" on them they asked who said it. Hannah told me she didn't want to lie so she admitted she had. Instantly, she became enemy #1 to the sisters. They told her they hated her, she was the most hated person on the bus and so on. They went on so much , Hannah emerged from the bus sobbing. She could hardly catch her breath to tell me what happened. I can't imagine how it must have felt to have two friends treat her this way.

The next day, the younger of the two made it her mission to spread her hate of Hannah, including writing it on the playground, on notebooks and even made a sign in sticks stating , "I hate Hannah".

As time went on, Hannah's other friends stuck up for her and the younger sister backed off. But then this week, the oldest sister began calling our house wanting to play with Hannah. The first two days, we were busy but the third day when Hannah pleaded with me that she did not want to play, I knew I needed to step in. I answered the phone and said very kindly" Sweetie, I have been hearing about how you and your sister have been treating other kids and until that changes, Hannah is not allowed to play with you." I said a few last things and she did quickly say "I'm sorry". Now time will only tell if she is indeed sorry.

I am very hopeful that both sisters will realize they will not have friends unless they treat others kindly. I don't wish for them to be alienated anymore then I want Hannah being bullied.

I am praying that things will resolve themselves in time and that God will direct us how to handle the next "childhood drama".



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